Whip out that hideous holiday vest and your tackiest Christmas decorations — it’s time to channel your inner Nora Krank.
Christmas with the Kranks is by far one of the most hilarious family holiday movies out there. From the Frosty the Snowman stalker (seriously, he’s so creepy) to the iconic shot of Tim Allen in a Speedo, it’s got our faces looking like a laugh-crying emoji every single year.
Another side effect? The movie’s plentiful food scenes will make your mouth water and your mind start counting down the days until your own Christmas feast.
In other words, you’re going to need some treats and drinks to fight off those cravings. Make it a full dinner and a movie night with these tasty picks.
Get your Christmas With the Kranks on
Before you can make your own dysfunctional family memories, you have to get the movie ready:
MOVIE: Christmas With the Kranks (Don’t have it? Get it at Amazon or see more options)
RUNNING TIME: 1 hour, 39 minutes
YEAR OF RELEASE: 2004
RATING: PG
STARRING: Tim Allen, Jamie Lee Curtis, Dan Aykroyd
Dinner and a movie: Your Christmas With the Kranks menu
And now, for our feature presentation…
Appetizer: Cranberry pistachio goat cheese bites
Luther makes a stupid number of mistakes in Christmas with the Kranks (we still cringe every time he steals and topples the neighbor’s Christmas tree), but his very first mistake is upsetting Nora by forgetting her pistachios at the grocery store.
We know that scene will have you craving their salty goodness, so be sure to have a batch of these cranberry pistachio goat cheese bites handy. Deceivingly easy to make, they’ll take just as long to prepare as they do to devour, if you catch our drift!
Entrée: Orange-pepper glazed baked ham
Let’s face it — Nora Krank is a fierce woman.
She never takes no for an answer and knows exactly how to get what she wants, from negotiating charity donations into her no-Christmas agreement with Luther, to fighting her way into the last hickory honey ham at the grocery store.
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That ham may not make it home after all, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy some yourself. Spice it up a little with this succulent orange-pepper glazed baked ham. With a mix of flavors like garlic, cloves, brown sugar, mustard and orange, it’s like a little Christmas party in your mouth.
Dessert: No-bake caramel shortbread pie
We all have that one dish we remember as the highlight of our childhood Christmases. For some, it’s their grandma’s fruitcake (no matter how dry it may be). For others, it’s their dad’s delicious dressing.
For Blair, it’s her mom’s caramel cream pie. You can make your own version with this delicious recipe from I Am Baker.
Just be sure to bring your sweet tooth to the table! This no-bake caramel shortbread pie features a cream cheese and caramel filling plus a generous drizzle of oozy, delicious caramel on top for an extra dose of indulgence. We’re pretty sure it would give Nora Krank a run for her money.
Drinks: Tropical tequila cocktails
Luther and Nora may not have made it on their Caribbean cruise after all, but you can kind of live out Luther’s dream of a hot-hot-hot green Christmas with these tropical tequila cocktails from Best Friends for Frosting.
One sip and you’ll feel like you’re on a cruise ship floating through the Cayman Islands. Plus the tequila will warm you up from head to toe!
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Just maybe consider Luther a cautionary tale and skip out on the tanning booth and Botox. That was not a good look.
Bonus! Make your own “Frosty” craft
Free Frosty! Free Frosty!
The Kranks’ Frosty may be the creepiest snowman of all time, but there’s nothing more adorable than these little tube sock snowmen. They’re so easy that you can even make them while you watch the movie, and all you need is some old socks, rice, a glue gun, some buttons and other crafty tidbits.
So, hop into your favorite holiday PJs, chill out on the couch and get ready for a relaxing night in. And may your holidays never be as hectic as the Kranks’ last-minute Christmas Eve party.
